Must Have Been Love
by triple-rocks
Summary: Song fic It must have been love but it's over now. GrissomSara


Title: Must Have Been Love  
  
Author: Bailey  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own it!  
  
Pairing: Sara/Grissom  
  
Spoilers: One or two references to a couple episodes, but they won't give anything away.  
  
Rating: G  
  
~~~ Lay a whisper on my pillow,   
  
Leave the winter on the ground.  
  
I wake up lonely,   
  
There's air of silence in the bedroom   
  
And all around.  
  
Touch me now,   
  
I close my eyes and dream away. ~~~  
  
Sara lay on her bed, tears streaming down her face. After wanting and needing him for so long, she finally got him, only to have him leave her. They weren't together that long, but it hurt just the same. She had been in love with him for so long, and it felt like her heart had been ripped out. She closed her eyes, thinking about him, wishing he was with her now. She wanted his arms around her, holding her, telling her that he loved her, that he always would.  
  
~~~ It must have been love   
  
But it's over now.  
  
It must have been good   
  
But I lost it somehow.  
  
It must have been love   
  
But it's over now.  
  
From the moment we touched   
  
'Til the time had run out. ~~~  
  
She should have known better than to get involved with him. When something seems too good to be true it normally is. She had been chasing him for three years, had been jerked around by him for just as long, had asked him out to dinner and he had rejected her. It wasn't a no thank you, it was a flat out no. She had been crushed, but hadn't let him know that. She had waited until she was home, alone as always before letting the sobs rack her body. She had finally fallen asleep when he had come to her door. Angry that someone was interrupting her she swung the door open ready to yell. Her jaw had dropped when she saw him, soaking wet from the sudden downpour.  
  
She had invited him against her better judgment. They had sat on the couch, knees touching, not talking. He turned to her after several minutes of silence, told her he was sorry and kissed her. She had been wanting that moment for so long that she couldn't bear to turn away. They had quickly moved to her bedroom, and she had been so happy she thought her heart was going to burst. He had whispered that he loved her while they made love, causing tears to come to her eyes. After longing for him, she finally had him.  
  
They had a two blissful weeks of each other, spending all their time outside of work at her apartment. They kept their relationship hidden from the others, but she didn't doubt that they thought something was up. They were after all highly trained investigators. The two of them arrived at work within minutes of each other, leaving at the end of shift on time. There was no more hostility in the air when they were around each other, and they just couldn't wipe the silly grins off their faces.  
  
Then, her whole world came crashing down upon her. They had been lying in her bed after making love, when he turned to her with a sad look in his eye. He touched her face, his lower lip trembling slightly. She remembered their conversation word for word.  
  
"I love you Sara," he whispered.  
  
"I hear a but coming on," she said looking into his eyes.  
  
"I'm not sure about this. I don't know if." he trailed off.  
  
"What do you mean?" she asked angrily. She climbed out of the bed grabbing the clothes they had so carelessly thrown around.  
  
"We don't make sense. I'm your boss, I'm older than you. It's not right," he said joining her in her hunt for clothes.  
  
"What the hell Grissom," she screamed. He looked up at her then, knowing how upset she was. Since their first night together, she had only called him Gil while they were alone.  
  
"Sara, I'm sorry," he said quietly reaching out to touch her.  
  
"Don't touch me," she spat out. "So what was I to you? Just someone to have sex with? Why did you come to me if you thought this? Why do you have to play with my heart? Why do you do this to me?"  
  
"Sara please," he whispered. "I love you. I just don't know what to say."  
  
"Leave!" she screamed. "Get out of my house. I don't want to see you."  
  
"Can't we just talk?" he asked desperately.  
  
"Leave NOW!" she screamed. She went into the bathroom, slamming the door. She broke down into sobs, not caring if he could hear her.  
  
She hadn't been back to work since that night, three days ago. She had called Catherine, telling her to talk to Grissom. Catherine had tried to find out what was wrong, but she wasn't sure she could talk about it. Nick and Warrick had called and left messages saying they were worried about her. Nick had sworn that if she didn't call him soon he was going to come over and knock down her door to see her. She felt bad for making them worry, but she needed time alone, needed time to heal from the wounds Grissom had inflicted upon her.  
  
~~~ Make-believing we're together,  
  
That I'm sheltered by your heart.  
  
But in and outside   
  
I've turned to water   
  
Like a teardrop in your palm.  
  
And it's a hard Christmas day,   
  
I dream away ~~~  
  
She stared out her window, watching the torrents of rain come down. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't stop loving him. She couldn't stop thinking about the weeks that they had spent together. She had learned so much about him and he learned about her as well. Just when she thought that she could be happy, things exploded.  
  
She had been thinking a lot about whether she was going to go back to the lab or not. In the years that she had been there, she had become good friends with many of her coworkers. She had different relationships with each of them, but she thought of them as family. She didn't want to leave them, but she wasn't so sure that she could continue to work with Grissom. He had hurt her, taking her heart and breaking it into a million pieced before stomping on it. She would have been fine had he not gave her that time together. She could have made it had she now know what she was missing.  
  
She wanted to be able to say that if he came to her that she wouldn't take him back, but she would just be lying to herself. As much as he had hurt her, she loved him and couldn't turn him away. If he only knew the power that he had over her, and to be honest it scared her a little. Knowing that no matter what he did he would always own her heart terrified her.  
  
~~~ It must have been love but it's over now,  
  
It was all that I wanted,   
  
Now I'm living without.  
  
It must have been love   
  
But it's over now,  
  
It's where the water flows,   
  
It's where the wind blows. ~~~  
  
When she heard a knock at her door she groaned. She was certain that it was Nick, coming to check on her like he had threatened. She wasn't up to seeing him, but knew if she didn't let him in he might very well knock down the door. She padded into the living room, and without looking through the hole opened the door.  
  
There he was, soaking wet from the rain, but unlike last time he had tears in his eyes.  
  
"What are you doing here?" she asked stepping back and allowing him space to enter.  
  
"I've been thinking for the past three days. I've been trying to convince myself that I did the right thing. I thought you deserved something better.someone better than me. I've went over the reasons why we shouldn't be together a million times, and although some are good reasons, they just don't add up. I love you Sara, and I know I made a mistake. I know I hurt you, and that you may never forgive me but I had to try," he paused looking at the tears in her eyes.  
  
"If I let you back in.are you going to leave again?" she asked.  
  
"I don't ever want to leave you. I love you," he said reaching out to her.  
  
She wanted to pull back, wanted to tell him to leave and never come back. She wanted to be strong enough to break the hold he had over her, but she wasn't. She leaned into his touch and closed her eyes. She felt him move closer, wrapping his arms around her.  
  
After a minute she leaned back, confusion filling his eyes. She studied his face seeing her pain from the last few days reflected there. He had dark bags under his eyes, and he looked exhausted. She reached up cupping his cheek, smiling as she remembered the first time she had done that.  
  
"We go slowly this time. No rushing it, no rushing each other," she whispered. He nodded with a smile. "Let's go to sleep. I'm sure we both can use it. We can talk more in the morning."  
  
He followed her into the bedroom. He changed into a pair of sweats and a t- shirt that he had left there and they climbed into the bed. She spooned herself against him, feeling at home.  
  
"I'm sorry for hurting you Sara," he said quietly.  
  
"Shh.Gil." She said twisting around and putting her finger to his lips. She kissed him softly and smiled. "I forgive you. I always have and I always will. I love you."  
  
"I'll never hurt you again," he whispered before closing his eyes and drifting off into a peaceful sleep. 


End file.
